It’s refreshing to see criminals who stay true to their roots. It seems like every crime these days is identity-theft this, and cyber-crime that. It’s nice to know that there’s still room for a classic jewel heist in our modern era.
Lmao yeah. Let’s keep tradition alive
Well, there’s a current, non-monarchical world leader who keeps posting AI video of himself wearing a crown, so you know… gotta procure one for free, somewhere!
Muricans talking about anything without mentioning POTUS: impossible
I thought POTUS: Impossible 3 was the best movie
how do you know that person is murican? tankies not making a generalized assumption challenge: impossible
Who do you think they were stolen for? ;)
If we were in a Dan Brown novel, tomorrow an alleged descendant of Napoleon would proclaim himself the new emperor of France on the basis of an obscure law of the 2nd French Republic and lawyers would prove him right.
Obviously, this is how the 5th Republic will end.
Considering the current mess it is, it would not be that surprising.
Yeah we could do with a 6:th.
“After breaking windows, two men entered the building, while a third remained outside. The thieves stole nine pieces from Napoleon and the Empress’s jewelry collection: a necklace, a brooch, a tiara, and more. They were placed in the Napoleon and French Sovereigns display cases.”
Translated from French, source https://www.leparisien.fr/paris-75/le-musee-du-louvre-cible-dun-braquage-ce-dimanche-le-site-ferme-au-public-19-10-2025-DQII6PEIVVEDBM5KQMHDSCF6IM.php
Lmao the same technique a couple crackheads would use to pawn your tv. Given the nature of the heist our minds like to imagine a big conspiracy like in the movies with insider info etc, but nah just a classic smash n grab.
Yeeep. They dropped the crown on the way actually. So amateur its amazing
Authority tries to tell us action is impossible. That any infraction will be punished.
But lol, they can’t stop shit.
Gonna be really funny when these amateurs are never caught
They did leave behind their jackets etc. I wouldn’t be shocked if they make quick work of this case. Its too big for a couple of guys
Unless they just stole some random jackets to leave behind just to throw off investigators. Or frame someone.
Holy fuck that’s embarrassing, definitely DNA evidence there if they’re in any systems
Holy cow! I’ve been wondering what was actually stolen. Thanks for doing what I didn’t!
Sacre bleu!
I always wondered why the blue was sacred, never realizing it was a minced oath of “sacré Dieu!” or “holy god!”
Another of my favorites is “gadzooks”
Gadzooks and “Zounds” being from the same expression, ‘God’s wounds’; in that a perfect infinite being wouldn’t get injured. So something unbelievable, something impossible.
Which was disappointing to me as reading it in comic books, I always heard it my head as “zounds” rhyming with “sounds”, but it tain’t so.
Gadzooks is supposedly “gods hooks” (nails from the crucifixion) rather than the wounds.
Hm!
I always wondered why the blue was sacred
You clearly haven’t tasted a good blue cheese.
You are most likely right!
dag nabbit
This is honestly hype.
We don’t see enough grand jewel theives these days
I will confess I always had the fantasy of a heist of the koh-i-noor. Since I am a mughal lol.
And yes the history is long and complicated. I would recommend the William Dalrymple book here. Its genuinely like reading the lord of the rings from the rings perspective. Incredible stuff.
Have you heard about the spate of thefts of chinese cultural artifacts years back? A whole bunch of musuems had sophisticated high end “thefts” where the only objects taken were things that had been looted from china by imperial powers. The common assumption was that the chinese state decided to take their stuff back.
YES I WAS LITERALLY POSTING THAT RIGHT NOW.
First I was gonna mention it in the comment section bit thought after this post people might like a whole post lol.
That’s pretty fucking cool and the most antiimperialist communist thing they’ve done in my lifetime.
I genuinely don’t believe the current government is that cool.
Be the change!
Plot twist: they’re explorers collecting anthropological artifacts to their museum back home.
British empire back at it??
The crown of impératrice Eugénie (Napoléon III), on the first picture, was actually abandonned during their escape and it was found damaged.
I heard some former policeman specialized in heists saying that it seems the team was half experiences half newbies. The entrance was perfect but the escape was a mess. They left the crown but also all sorts of objects like jackets and blankets that the police will be able to analyze.
Also, these jewels are so famous that it will be hard to resell or display anywhere, so they would have to sell them stone by stone for a fraction of the price of the whole. So it’s hard to understand the motive.
Sell em to some rich private collector who doesn’t care. Surely Musk would like to masturbate wearing a crown.
Why not a commissioned crime? Seems safer than trying to find the rich dude after the fact
Who’s gonna commission amateurs and have the liability of being tied to em before the crime.
Or trust the idiots.
Oh please. Like he doesn’t.
Crack. The motive is crack.
Shame the PayDay franchise is a broken mess these days, that’d be quite the fucking level.
What’s crazy to me is that it’s in the same room as this ( or at least was when I was there)
So, which billionaires secret private collection does this end up gracing. Bezos seems like an easy bet, for the super villain aesthetic, but kinda cliche. I can see Peter Thiel on some esoteric Nazi shit going for it. Who else?
Thiel is a better bet¹ because of the explicit monarchism, but I’d definitely bet on a European parasite. French, maybe swiss.
¹than bezos
One of the French?
I love a museum heist
I was talking about this with friends the other day.
Why the hell would they publicly display the actual jewels in a public display in a museum? You’d think that they would place a set that were indistinguishable replicas that the average person would never know … hell, even a professional jeweller would need to pick them up and examine them up close with a magnifying lens to identify them properly.
Then take the actual real jewels and store them in a super secure vault underground where only two people are allowed access. Something like … just place them under so much security and strong storage that no one or very people could have access them them.
It’s hard to believe that they would place jewels that are worth hundreds of millions of dollars behind millions of dollars of security behind a glass case. I know the glass case was more secure than that but it was unsecure enough for some idiot to climb in through a window and break open things to get to the jewels.
The only other explanation we came up with is that the heist was organized by the museum or owners themselves as some kind of insurance scam. Everyone always suspects anonymous thieves but seldom suspect the actual owners or museum managers.
Some museum curators believe it is the right of their visitors to see the real historical objects. Showing them a fake, from this point of view, makes the museum pointless since anyone can look up a picture online or find a convincing copy nowadays.
That’s also the opinion of visitors like me. What’s the point of going to the Louvres to see a replica? Just send the replica to my home town library then.
Thats what the museum gift shop is for
I get that … but to you and me and the average Joe … if you showed us a professionally made fake set of the French crown jewels behind glass, four feet away, would we be able to tell the difference?
It is a matter of integrity and honor on the business side. It’s not about us, it’s about the owner and the honesty of the business services they want to provide. Their museum is a place to display artifacts, it is not a theatre for clones and copies.
Have you been to a french museum? I don’t know much for jewellery but you can straight go up and poke at an invaluable painting. But people just don’t.
The Louvre staff have been striking for years about the lack of staff and security and they have no private security as its not a private establishment.
According to reports its just average joes stealing it in an average Joe way.
A lot of stuff actually is replicated. Like the priest king which I’ve posted on this community is actually a replica while the original is in the museum vault.
And the vaults are massive. People havent even seen most of the stuff that exists there. Aren’t even aware of the things we have.
“We?”
Humanity as a whole I meant lol. We don’t even know the discoveries that have been made.
The Vatican liberry has a shit ton of forbidden stuff.
They say.
Probably have some manuscripts that’s for sure.
Ah yes, indeed!
Maybe the thieves got the fakes. The real ones are secretly stored. The Museum helps the police “find” the stolen jewels by planting the real ones. The buyer finds out their loot is fake and takes it out on the thieves. Also, there’s a car chase, some parkour, a little bit of shooting, a love triangle, a surprise betrayal, and retribution at the end.
Might want to mix it up a little bit and turn it into a motorcycle chase across foot paths and walkways, turn the love triangle into a gay love triangle, give it a surprise-surprise-surprise betrayal and skip the retribution.
That does sound even better. Is this a tragic ending?
A tragedy instead of a comedy
I would definitely watch that.
