Nose still attached?
Now we’re both sorry.
That can’t be stressed enough.
Came that sound from your face?
Now we both shat our pants.

“Oh Jesus christ! Go open a window and wash your hands.” Was what my Dad liked to say…

This was 2020

achoo - Bless you.

achoo - You only get one.

achoo - Stop that.

THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER!!!

I had a buddy who would just tut loudly whenever someone sneezed in the office. Second sneeze got a “ffffff” and third one got a “shushhh”.

I want people to be karmically balanced so I always tell them to go to hell

In germany some real life examples are:

• "aufwischen! ": get a mop
• "stirb leise! ": die qietly

I tell Mrs. Noodle to cut it out every time.

I usually just ‘shhhhhh’ them

“Ew what was that? Do you do that all the time? I’ve never seen anyone do that before.”

You get one blessing. Multiple sneezes are a scam for more blessings. If I keep blessing you, what’s your incentive to ever stop sneezing?

Gazebo

I usually just look at them sternly and shush them 🤫 ssshhhhh!

Sometimes, just to shake it up, I say “fuck you” or “go to hell.”