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linsenchip@piefed.zip to Microblog Memes@lemmy.worldEnglish · 10 天前

Life would be different

media.piefed.zip

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Life would be different

media.piefed.zip

linsenchip@piefed.zip to Microblog Memes@lemmy.worldEnglish · 10 天前
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  • viral.vegabond@piefed.social
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    10 天前

    Also, what if it wasn’t clipped short. Instead, you could grow it out a little to have a built in baseball cap

    • ThePantser@sh.itjust.works
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      10 天前

      But which way would it grow?

      • viral.vegabond@piefed.social
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        9 天前

    • ApeNo1@lemmy.world
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      9 天前

      You hit the nail on the head.

      • Fmstrat@lemmy.world
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        9 天前

        Our largest predator would be a hammerhead shark.

    • AeronMelon@lemmy.worldM
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      10 天前

      You just sold me.

      • Slovene85@sh.itjust.works
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        9 天前

        Woah, are you saying viral.vegabond is a human trafficker?

    • VibeSurgeon@piefed.social
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      9 天前

      Extreme convenience. How cursed our biology is to have robbed us of this functionality

      • T156@lemmy.world
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        9 天前

        On the other hand, we’ve also never had to deal with an ingrown headnail, so small mercies.

    • ceenote@lemmy.world
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      9 天前

      Remember to look down when filing it, though. Don’t want to get scalp nail in your eyes.

      • viral.vegabond@piefed.social
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        9 天前

        True, nobody likes it when they get scalp nail in their eyes. Lol

    • red_tomato@lemmy.world
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      9 天前

      People probably would attach ornaments to the grown head nail.

      • Mouselemming@sh.itjust.works
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        9 天前

        Would you use a giant nail-polish brush or use the little ones to do elaborate artwork?

        • viral.vegabond@piefed.social
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          9 天前

          Giant, gotta get shit done. Lol

      • viral.vegabond@piefed.social
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        9 天前

        like piercings or something, kind of?

    • TheOrcWhoWrites@lemmy.world
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      10 天前

      Yay. no sun in my eyes.

      • viral.vegabond@piefed.social
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        10 天前

        Painting it would be an option too. Or sharpening it. The possibilities are endless!!

        • TheOrcWhoWrites@lemmy.world
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          10 天前

          Sharpening it so you can headbutt someone else in a human mating ritual lol .

          • viral.vegabond@piefed.social
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            10 天前

            Yes, definitely something one -could- do…

    • snoons@lemmy.ca
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      9 天前

      And you could like carve it into cool shapes or harden it into a head spike for killing rich people.

      • viral.vegabond@piefed.social
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        9 天前

        I like where you’re going with this.

  • Otter@lemmy.ca
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    9 天前

    https://spykids.fandom.com/wiki/Thumb_Thumbs

    • Shifty@sh.itjust.works
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      9 天前

      I’ve had nightmares about these…

    • brown567@sh.itjust.works
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      8 天前

      I came to the comments expecting literally this exact screenshot

  • Entertainmeonly (she/her)@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    10 天前

  • wrinkle2409@lemmy.cafe
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    9 天前

    Ingrown headnail

    • brown567@sh.itjust.works
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      8 天前

      Just decapitate me at that point

  • Ixoid@aussie.zone
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    9 天前

  • [object Object]@lemmy.ca
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    10 天前

    Life would be different if we pooped out of our mouths like a sea cucumber.

    • Dharma Curious (he/him)@slrpnk.net
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      9 天前

      Life would be different if we threw out babies at predators when startled, like quokka

  • DarkCloud@lemmy.world
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    10 天前

    Showers, barbers, and fights will all be different… As will clothes, probably the skin colour of our faces. Our digestive systems might be different (from consuming nail stuff during famines). Our vision may be different.

    Torture would be different. Gender, because we’d likely all paint our nails. Tool use might have different origins. We’d likely move different, and perhaps have different neck muscles and bone structure.

    Basically we probably wouldn’t recognize the new society. It would be alien to us.

    • Carnelian@lemmy.world
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      9 天前

      Mortal kombat fatality animations would be different

    • toynbee@piefed.social
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      9 天前

      I’m uncomfortable with you using “will” in that first sentence.

      • DarkCloud@lemmy.world
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        9 天前

        The crab people are cumming.

  • 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮 @pawb.social
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    9 天前

    We’d probably fight more with headbutts than with punches. Boxing would be cray. Safety equipment probably would be different.

  • HugeNerd@lemmy.ca
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    9 天前

    Hmmm make it a big toe nail so it gets yellow and thick and accumulates cheese underneath so I can scrape and eat on the go.

    • Artemis_Mystique@lemmy.ml
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      9 天前

      c/cursedcomments

  • folekaule@lemmy.world
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    9 天前

    I would say OP hit the nail on the head here. It would be different.

  • hdsrob@lemmy.world
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    9 天前

    Those nail clippers are going to be huge.

    • hdsrob@lemmy.world
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      9 天前

      Although I guess that “hair stylists” would get replaced with nail techs. Head Nail styles would be crazy.

    • brown567@sh.itjust.works
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      8 天前

      They’d probably use saws or grinders at that scale

      I almost exclusively use a coarse file for my toenails so they don’t break weird and get ingrown

  • 𝙈𝙞𝙖@quokk.au
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    9 天前

    Magpies wouldn’t feel so smug that’s for sure.

  • ianhclark510@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    10 天前

    Amogus

    • TheOrcWhoWrites@lemmy.world
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      10 天前

      Sus.

  • inari@piefed.zip
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    9 天前

    Natural helmet

  • Fizz@lemmy.nz
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    9 天前

    Nail salons would be booming

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