Joined Lemmy and was randomly adding communities. Started getting random memes coming through and that’s when I found out what a “bussy” was.
Oh these comments are going to go to helpful places I’m sure.
:3
Coming here after the post was changed to be a gif of puppies chasing a little kid, reading the comments really confused me until I realized what happened
Edit: lol never mind my app wasn’t showing me the full height gif
I stumbled upon a conversation about violence against women on Twitter once. The lady spearheading it was of strong opinions against men. Yes, violence against women is abhorrent, and those responsible should be held accountable. Women have the right to be safe.
But … she seemed to be blaming every man on Earth, going so far as to call for their eradication.
I happened to make the innocent (yes, truly, I’d never heard or used the statement before), that ‘not all men’ are like the scumbags who commit violence against women.
Well … !
“FUCK OFF WITH YOUR NOT ALL MEN BULLSHIT, YOU MYSOGYNIST TROLL CUNT!” And further robust exclamations and accusations of that nature ensued.
Educated as to the limitations of my knowledge in this area, I decided to withdraw from the conversation.
Civil discourse dies on twitter. The algo demands “engagement”.
Also, the absolute irony of using Elon Musk’s platform to push a progressive or faux-progressive view point.
The irony being that,
- Men are the overwhelming victims of non-reciprocal physically violent domestic violence; being about 71% of the victims.
- Even in terms of random assaults by strangers, over 80% of the victims are men.
- And finally, even if we look at the big kahuna of cross-gender rape, it turns out that women rape men as frequently as men rape women. It’s just that not only have most men been brainwashed into thinking that men cannot be raped, but that even the FBI did not consider it as rape until 2015 (so no national stats exist before this time), and even now many police precincts have software that hard-codes the victim as female and the perp as male, further corrupting justice.
From the time article you linked: "Nearly 7 percent of men, however, reported that at some point in their lives, they were “made to penetrate” another person—usually in reference to vaginal intercourse, receiving oral sex, or performing oral sex on a woman. This was not classified as rape, but as “other sexual violence.”
The term usually is not scientific. There needs to be more clarity here.
Also, this article is strange– it has the aggressive tone of someone with a grudge and something to prove. But the take away of this article seems to be more about standardizing vocabulary when researching sexual assault and rape for better accuracy and NOT about claiming women rape as much as men so therefore sexual assault and rape against women is a non-issue.
I was just there, looking at a meme that I didn’t understand, with comments that I not only didn’t understand, but don’t even comprehend how they relate to the post.
I really try to be understanding and tolerant of all perspectives, but don’t think I’ve ever felt more disoriented in my life. It was totally alien to me.
I chose not to engage, because I couldn’t even figure out what the fuck was going on.
Somehow read this at first as “straight German man” and it still made sense.
Ja, hier, guten Tag.
I don’t want to upvote and intrude on their shit but they’re funny
As long as it’s ironic. Actual female incels are every bit as bad as their male counterparts.
pretty sure female incels have never shot up a school or massage parlor, but I personally don’t need to put people on some kind of badness hierarchy
Brenda Ann Spencer? There’s an old song about her called “I Don’t Like Mondays”.
i dont think that’s a femcel bro
The first half of your sentence is you doing exactly what you say you don’t do in the second half
dont need to
I think you’re fine. It’s more of a vibe and if you identify with it you’re welcome. As opposed to womenstuff that is very much exclusive.
same! I love femcel memes. The lesbian ones are pretty funny too but it’s the same thing. It’s not my space to yap in, but I’m going to save that meme and share it with my friends.
I’m a dude and I’ve posted memes there
Same XD
I browse “All” most of the time and the Femcel Memes show up pretty regularly. It’s not like this gif though. It’s more like watching a super interesting science experiment.
“Ah, yes. I see. I see. How interesting!”
My scientific notes so far:
- They crave cuddles. It’s almost like a cuddle-based economy.
They crave cuddles.
Who among us cannot say the same?
deleted by creator
Everyone has different preferences, straight man here and I always want cuddles. It depends on what your “love language” is i.e. how you prefer to give/receive affection.
For me cuddles and other forms of non-sexual touch (not that I’m asexual, far from it) are my preference for giving and receiving. Acts of service, like cooking a meal etc. I’m fine with giving but it makes me feel awkward to receive. And gift giving (random flowers, chocolate, trinkets, etc.) I prefer not to do because trying to come up with a good gift stresses me out and I don’t like random gifts, I really appreciate the thought but if I don’t find a use for it, including being a decoration I like, I don’t want it.
But like you said, you find a middle ground with your partner and I do the same as well.
I can! I’m disgusted by other people touching me. I’m more like those shy cats that hide under the furniture if you try to pet them, and only come hang out next to you if you leave them alone
(and yes it’s 'tism)
You can crave cuddles and be disgusted by other human beings at the same time.
It’s called I have a person, and only that person may touch me. And the cat. The cat too.
Understandable, yes! I lack that too though, I just don’t like to be touched nor touch others, and I do not desire it either. I do like to pet… or I guess more like poke and pat animals (though there’s specific conditions for what type of fur I will tolerate touching), but that’s about it. I can hug my dog but that’s about the extend of it. I also have problems with my own limbs touching each other or my torso which causes more issues honestly. “Touch starved” is something I simply don’t understand lmao
Until you wrote “I also have problems with my own limbs”, I thought your sensitivity could be due to the warmth of other human bodies which some people find hard to deal with, indeed. But if you also have a constant “pins and needles” feeling and cannot even stand your own touch, so to speak, you might want to look into your sodium levels. It changed things a very great deal for me. Well, that and seriously reducing my caffeine intake.
Oh no it’s not “pins and needles” it’s just disgust, I have hypersensitivity to touch in general and touching humans is basically just the worst of it for some reason. A bit like you’d step on dog shit or touch something rotting etc. I get the shivers and all that, it’s terrible. If I don’t get the unpleasant touch to stop quick enough, eventually I go crazy and will struggle like a rabid animal, since it’s so intolerable - I know because I’ve gotten to that point couple times by trying jeans on… I don’t know why or how my own limbs can trigger this shit as well, it’s just my stupid corpse being shitty I guess. I can’t do breathing exercises or mindfulness stuff either, because becoming even more aware of my body makes it so much worse
I just took an NFPA 70E electrical safety course, and the instructor was talking about how electricians love to cuddle.
I thought it was weird for a sec, then I remembered the last time I opened an electrical panel with someone else nearby. Then I remembered every other time I opened an electrical panel with other people nearby. Then I remembered all the times that I was all the other people nearby.
Then he showed us a video of an arc flash with 3 people inside the panel, and then there was nobody nearby.
Arc flashes are nature’s way of saying cuddle time is over.
Straight guys can’t say it. Not because they don’t crave them, they just can’t say that they do without social sanction. Everyone else apparently gets a pass though.
I’ll say it; I crave cuddles.
Cuddles while watching TV is one of the only things that’ll pull me away from my computer.
Brave. Now say it on a de-anonymized platform and enjoy being a social pariah for the rest of your life.
I’m absolutely baffled by this comment. What makes you think this would be an even remotely controversial thing to say?
It might have something to do with the fact that I’ve personally experienced being shamed and ridiculed for saying similar things.
People like to jump to conclusions, so “I crave cuddles” quickly becomes “I demand woman flesh” in their perception.
Pffft. Grow the fuck up, find your fucking balls and fucking own it.
It only plays that way if you let it.
Having balls doesn’t stop society from ridiculing/deriding/scorning/stigmatizing/sanctioning me. Oh, if only growing a pair was all I needed to do.
It only plays that way if you let it.
As if being rejected by society is something I have control over! It takes a sociopathic narcissist to think “people can only hate me if I let them.”
It takes the aforementioned set of minerals to cease giving a flying fuck what those that have negative comment for showing your feelings have to say.
Society at large doesn’t ridicule for that, merely certain toxic subsets that should be rightfully shunned into nonexistence.
Become the change you want to see.
True, I get heavy insults from people just for being sick around them. I don’t mean transmissible sickness. Like, the moment you are sick and can’t hide it, they expect you to quit your job and go die somewhere.
I definitely crave them.
Another note is that they seem to all be autistic, with many of them exhibiting symptoms of severe depression. Most are also trans lesbians. Many seem to be cat/fox/puppygirls.
Conclusion: headpats are in order
Depressed autistic transbians commiserating about loneliness
“Aw cute puppygirls!” head pats
Depessed autistic cis guys commiserating about loneliness
“Ew gross incels, yuck!” social stigma
The fact they’re mostly trans take the appeal from me.
I mean, you don’t have to be attracted to anything you’re not attracted to. No one is saying “you have to like puppygirls!”
The point isn’t to fetishize femcels. The point is that double-standards are a problem that maybe understandably lead to people feeling left behind by society.
Maybe “incels” have a legitimate reason for feeling discontent after all, and it’s not “because women tell them no” like people claim. More like “because people ridicule them for being alone.”
The difference being that the puppygirls aren’t lashing out and demeaning others … they’re just bed rotting while watching yaoi
Lots of lonely guys aren’t lashing out and demeaning others either, but people don’t notice them because they’re not lashing out and demeaning others. They still get labeled as incels though, and if they find that hurtful then people will absolutely shred them for it anyway.
Also, they’ll be shamed for bed rotting, and shamed for watching yuri. No matter what they do, they’ll be shamed for it. So it’s honestly not surprising when a number of them end up lashing out.
Are people calling those who don’t behave like assholes “incel” though?
And do you think that women are not judged if they behave in the femcel manner?
It seems like you’re applying a double standard, there.
Yes, people do call even the ones who aren’t being assholes “incels.” It’s a derogatory term that gets used against anyone who doesn’t get laid. Like calling someone a “virgin.” It’s shitty, and it promotes toxic masculinity. It also objectifies women by implying that men need to “get p***y” in order to be worthy of basic respect.
And I’m tired of hearing this excuse that “it doesn’t refer to literal involuntary celibates, it refers to redpilled misogynistic jerks.” But that simply isn’t true, because people definitely apply it to literal “involuntary celibates” and use it as an insult like calling someone a “virgin.” It’s childish and immature. Also, there are lots of misogynistic jerks who get laid. Focusing all your ire on “incels” misses the point entirely, lets those people off the hook, and perpetuates the issue by communicating the subtext that “you can be a misogynistic jerk as long as you get laid, and then we’ll still respect you.” If you can’t see how that’s toxic and detrimental to society, then I can’t help you.
And do you think that women are not judged if they behave in the femcel manner?
They’re more likely to be fetishized, which is bad in a different way. But it certainly hasn’t risen to the level of a cultural pastime like shaming incels has.
It seems like you’re applying a double standard, there.
I’m not the one applying a double-standard. I’m pointing out the double-standard.
I never said “femcels should be shamed, and incels shouldn’t be.”
I said “femcels don’t get shamed the same way incels do.”
If the former is how you interpret the latter, that’s on you. If I need to explicitly state what I meant, it’s closer to this:
“Maybe nobody should be shamed for being lonely and having poor social skills, regardless of gender.”
If the issue is misogyny, target the misogyny. Not the inability to get sex, because that is going to do nothing to address the misogyny.
From that wall of text, I’m going to surmise that “incel” has been used as a pejorative towards you, with a reason that you’re blind to
All well said and more articulate than I could pull off, bravo.
Hmm yes they often are even when they are just complaining that they disdain the situation. I don’t know about women though I don’t know that many that are bed rotting
If they can look up Yaoi, bed rot, or even have the energy to complain about men, they are underemployed. I can’t even think about sex without realizing I could probably pull it off, but my job would get in the way of it, as with anything. The workplace is our god, everything, even family is secondary, because you can’t have family without work.
They’ll be nice if you give them a pink monster and tell them they’re a good girl.
I prefer white monster but yes
just wait till you see the cuddle parties in vrchat with full body tracking hehe
(I’m the one with piece signs)
though, unfortunately not with the folks from femcel memes… :(
^cough cough !VRChat@sh.itjust.works cough cough^
Strange as fuck heh. Also, it’s a rich person solution as well.
How do you even become a femcel? Men literally swarm anything roughly women like
Name checks out
Valuing personal safety and not having the energy to filter through that swarm for safe/trustworthy men is my guess.
He might have be old enough to have been part of the original invcel message boards. It was a woman who kick started the whole thing.
Fascinating Reply All podcast about it.
https://podcasts.apple.com/ie/podcast/120-invcel/id941907967?i=1000411090966
You don’t know any woman that you definitely wouldn’t date?
Being MAGA disqualifies you. Even then, I might think if her only problem is a lack of men accepting her, maybe her finding someone would make her stop going MAGA? At least another woman if nothing else.
But I don’t trust humans enough to be vulnerable near them atm, so past tense. They only understand paycuts and lawsuits, that’s how I establish facts, through legal documents and courts.
That’s the entire joke, at least seen from the man’s side.
These femcels actually believe that they are involuntarily celibate, when it actually comes 100% down to them not wanting the lower-90% of men in any capacity except as simps to do things for them and beta orbiters to maintain their egos.
That doesn’t make them involuntarily celibate in any way, shape, or form, it just makes them deeply delusional of their own value, and horrendously self-sabotaging.
Honestly, the hate and gender bigotry coming out of those communities make male incels look like rank amateurs. Men are so wildly behind the curve - compared to women - where gender bigotry is concerned that I’m shocked that men are even considered a problem, much less the problem.
I mean, when was the last time you heard of men advocating to kill all women except for a small, select breeding population who exists purely to keep the population maintained?
And yet, this is the fave philosophy of several of feminism’s greatest founders and writers - to bring the male population down to (depending on who is doing the advocating) either less than 1% of the population, or even lower. That men’s only purpose should be for sperm production, and so vanishingly few men would ever be needed except as a minimum level of genetic diversity. These women are lauded and widely celebrated by feminists everywhere.
You literally cannot make this shit up.
Literally just makes up a bunch of shit
You literally cannot make this shit up.
Literally just makes up a bunch of shit
Except I don’t have to. Plenty of women have blazed this path.
Most prominently:
- Sally Miller Gearhart
- Mary Daly
- Lois Waisbrooker
With plenty more waiting in the wings.
Finally,
Feminism isn’t about equality. It never was. It’s all about female supremacy, “special rights for me but not for thee”; about punishing men in the present for the sins of their fathers and grandfathers.
Except I don’t have to.
Nobody ever accused you of having to spew a bunch of bullshit, misogynistic misinformation.
I gave you the names of three prominent feminist authors who worried about exactly that subject, and you are still calling bullshit?
You are really mired in anti-reality, and blind to real-world facts.
I will give you the benefit of the doubt that you’re arguing in good faith for one more comment.
These femcels _actually believe_ that they are _involuntarily_ celibate, when it actually comes 100% down to them not wanting the lower-90% of men in any capacity except as simps to do things for them and beta orbiters to maintain their egos.
Can we agree that this comment is misogynistic on its face?
It managed to be pretty insulting to men at the same time, so I guess that’s a defense, of sorts.
It appears to be your take on it.
Yikes
That link? Absolutely yikes. Vanishingly few people understand how virulently misandrist feminism is.
And those authors make the worst incel out there look like a rank amateur.
what a sad way to go through life.
what a sad way to go through life.
Yes, being obsessed with reality and those pesky facts and evidence is just so sad.
Idk funny meme are funny
You literally can.
You literally can.
Except I don’t have to. Plenty of women have blazed this path.
Most prominently:
- Sally Miller Gearhart
- Mary Daly
- Lois Waisbrooker
With plenty more waiting in the wings.
Finally,
Feminism isn’t about equality. It never was. It’s all about female supremacy, “special rights for me but not for thee”; about punishing men in the present for the sins of their fathers and grandfathers.
If you have a problem with feminism, have a problem with actual feminism, actual feminists and actual mainstream feminist arguments. Instead of cherry-picking 3 dead women and misrepresenting them, start here instead: https://www.unwomen.org/en/articles/explainer/what-is-feminism
I wouldn’t say the feminists I know believe any of that stuff. Most of them are focused on poverty and rape and how those things affect women.
I wouldn’t say the feminists I know believe any of that stuff. Most of them are focused on poverty and rape and how those things affect women.
I think you need to read this.
You aren’t the tail which wags the dog in feminist circles. The man-hating gender bigots who lead all these feminist organizations are the ones who control the narrative. The more hateful, spiteful, and extreme they are, the more they get celebrated as role models for young women.
All I can say is that feminism is not a monolith. It is an incredibly fragmented ideology. There is only one thing you could honestly say that every feminist in the world 100% agrees on, and that is that sexism is bad.
I have read precisely one book about feminism, and that book is The Will to Change by bell hooks. She is maybe the most influential feminist of the 21st century. In the book she writes that hating men is bad and that it hurts the movement. She also had an incredibly simple definition of feminism: sexism is bad and we should stop it. I wonder why she is so popular.
Anyway, yeah, all that shit in your links is awful. Its also incredibly fucking fringe, and the feminist circles you’re referring to are not representative of the broader feminist movement. Your take here is nuclear, as in it’s radioactive. You couldn’t be worse at attacking feminism dude.
Anyway I’d be willing to bet the femcelmemes comm isn’t too thrilled about having two dudes bicker about feminism in the comments so I am gonna hit the eject button on this conversation. I hope you have a pleasant day.
I didn’t opt into this world and won’t be opted out by some moron either. I have mine, and anyone who does not respect that, can eat lead.
I neither care about them, nor bother them, nor am interested in them, so they better not get any ideas.
I love the femcel memes people. What scares me is if Violet08 finds them, I think together they would be too powerful.
Yeah, but violet gets laid tho
I don’t know if people realize that she is a freaking minor.
I like femcelmemes and all the posters there. It’s like tumblr, but with fewer chips on shoulders
Oh don’t get me wrong, they’re a fantastic, mutually supportive community. I just didn’t realize what I was walking into at first. It was like entering a club I had no business entering.
I was today years old when I realized everyone else in that picture is a woman XD
The ioke in that scene is just chef’s kiss, worth watching the whole episode for
A lack of a proper fire escape is no joke, it’s a death sentence. Take things seriously.
The first time I commented there, I tried to be courteous in the way I usually was on tumblr. People responded kindly, but read a bit confused. I quickly realized that the club was open to all. (Within reason)
Which is to say, similar experience
It’s been a few years since I delved into the Reddit side, but the femcel communities here are much nicer places to be than the subreddits. There’s some feeling of independence and empowerment here, whereas the subreddits were always overwhelmed by insufferable idiots. They were truly the female version of terminally online incels.
I think it’s worse in leemy. I honestly feel like killing myself half the time I am here and it’d only a little better then reddit.
Wrraf arf raf arf!!! :3
rough rough!!! :3
