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Both is bad if it is a regular occurrence. But one is much worse than the other.
I disagree. I imagine he’s just being fun and adoring her openly because behind the facade of drunk he can be enthusiastic and silly
Sure, but this can be manipulative or a sign of dependence in a bad way too. Hence my comment.
Also you shouldn’t get this drunk on the regular. But alcoholics still deserve love and care, just to make that clear. But their partners should make sure that it’s a healthy relationship.
You guys, is love manipulative?
Professions of it can be. See BPD type behavior. But also during situations like conflict repeated assertion of love can be a means of deflecting criticism. It’s not necessarily meant to manipulate and often is a trauma response, but it prevents open and honest communication where it’s needed and pressures the other person into not doing what they need.
I’m not going to argue with you about any of that, but I would like to point out that this is kind of like asserting that our sun will eventually become a red giant and engulf the earth in fire and magma every time someone is happy about a beautiful sunny day.
That’s only what, like, once ever 16 seconds? Completely normal.
Mean drunks are the worst. Or just people that can’t handle their alcohol and still do it to excess.
Every drunk person is annoying if you are sober sure. But happy drunks, at worst they will tell you the same stories over and over again, not try to fight you.
Well, to an extent. Whenever my one friend and I drink he decides to try and relive his high school wrestling days with me.
I’ll win one of these days Matt you slippery son of a gun.
Huh, is there something else at work there? Does he tell you about greco roman wrestling and suggest getting scantily clad and oiling up for the wrestle? I’ve been there, not exactly, but I’m straight so it’s awkward.
Question 2: where can I find this “Matt”? To ask him these questions, of course.
My ex wife was an alcoholic, and an asshole when she was drunk. I eventually learned that she is an asshole, and everything else was just a front that slipped when she had enough to drink. I someone has bad behavior when they’re drunk, it’s just the real them leaking out.
In vino, veritas. -ancient Roman saying
I feel the real person is drunk person, not that drinking makes them do stuff. When I am drunk, no one can tell, and I will just go to sleep. I know people that will go off the rails when they get drunk, without fail.
Sleeping is the best thing to do when drunk! I have no idea how people have the energy to be asshats when drunk. I only wanted to find a bed and snuggle in.
I knew a guy who had a homing beacon.
He’d put away a quantity of alcohol that would be fatal to most elephants, the switch would flick, and he would just fuck off. No warning, no goodbyes, nothing.
He’d either get a taxi, hitchhike, walk, or fuck knows what to get the 30 miles back home. Sometimes it was with his belongings. Sometimes we’d return them to him the following day.
It was scarily impressive… once you knew he was safe!
It’s partially a matter of tolerance. I used to be the same until I started getting blackout drunk while still staying horizontal enough to keep walking and talking, and of course, drinking.
That’s when you get into the real embarrassing stories. You’ll find your rock bottom there, anyway. I did.
I’m sure I’m a squishy sap when I’m drunk - the “I love you man” guy - but I’m told I just wander off and sleep also. Phew!
I feel the real person is drunk person
My feeling is the real person is in flux and is both the sober and drunk versions. Who they are when times are good and times are bad, etc. To that point, there are things people can do to ensure they’re better people more of the time.
Yeah the drunk person has less capacity to hide and regulate their emotions and thoughts. If you have to try to be good that’s you being good, but trying while drunk is harder
So Thats why I start crying when really drunk. Im just a sad excuse of a person
spoiler: Jake is a LLM
Nah, I’m just codependent.
I tell my wife the same stuff Jack does and I don’t even blow money on booze.
My wife does get a bit annoyed by the drunken professions of love, lol
