- cross-posted to:
- autism@lemmy.world
- cross-posted to:
- autism@lemmy.world
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if you want to read the original thread, check this: https://nitter.net/tinymediaempire/status/1136992675742269440#m
If I were drunk, I’d probably get 300$ out of the ATM and laugh the entire hour or whatever it took…
Then eat like 10 and give the rest away to people.
10/10 dark af 1/10 sandwiches are rubbbery
Oh shit I thought it was a shopped picture just for the concept
it is, the designer/illustrator Daniel Danger did a render of both sides
Yeah after looking again I noticed that 😅
“Cash only. I don’t have Venmo because I’m not some teenage asshole who vapes”
That part got me haha
My gf and her friends are in their late twenties and vape, how old is this post?
Very.
2019
Very old
Zoomer genocide when
Zenocide?
I’m stealing that
2019
It’s definitely poking fun at the fact that people who vape are younger on average than those who smoke cigs, not supposing literally only teens vape.
Sort of like how lots of old people also use venmo, but it’s particularly popular among the young.
I’m middle aged and vape. A lot of us old-heads switched from cigarettes a long time ago.
A grilled cheese consists of only these following items. Cheese. Bread with spread (usually butter). This entire subreddit consist of “melts”. Almost every “grilled cheese” sandwich i see on here has other items added to it. The fact that this subreddit is called “grilledcheese” is nothing short of utter blasphemy. Let me start out by saying I have nothing against melts, I just hate their association with sandwiches that are not grilled cheeses. Adding cheese to your tuna sandwich? It’s called a Tuna melt. Totally different. Want to add bacon and some pretentious bread crumbs with spinach? I don’t know what the hell you’d call that but it’s not a grilled cheese. I would be more than willing to wager I’ve eaten more grilled cheeses in my 21 years than any of you had in your entire lives. I have one almost everyday and sometimes more than just one sandwich. Want to personalize your grilled cheese? Use a mix of different cheeses or use sourdough or french bread. But if you want to add some pulled pork and take a picture of it, make your own subreddit entitled “melts” because that is not a fucking grilled cheese. I’m not a religious man nor am I anything close to a culinary expert. But as a bland white mid-western male I am honestly the most passionate person when it comes to grilled cheese and mac & cheese. All of you foodies stay the hell away from our grilled cheeses and stop associating your sandwich melts with them. Yet again, it is utter blasphemy and it rocks me to the core of my pale being. Shit, I stopped lurking after 3 years and made this account for the sole purpose of posting this. I’ve seen post after post of peoples “grilled cheeses” all over reddit and it’s been driving me insane. The moment i saw this subreddit this morning I finally snapped. Hell, I may even start my own subreddit just because I know this one exists now.
You god damn heretics. Respect the grilled cheese and stop changing it into whatever you like and love it for it what it is. Or make your damn melt sandwich and call it for what it is. A melt.
As a non American, where I am from, we call them toasties. Cheese toasties, cheese and tomato toasties, etc.
I don’t know of any puritans who argue about what a true toastie is, but I may have lived a sheltered life. People will argue about anything.
Toasties are the way!
And yeah I’d argue what makes a toastie is much more lenient than the american counterparts.
I’ve seen a toastie been called a toastie just because it was essentially a sandwich with toast.
No! My wife calls sandwiches made with toast toasties, and it’s wrong! These bad people need to be punished
Aussie??
Who calls a panini a jaffle for $500?
If we’re going to dive straight in to the pedantry then: a panini, in English speaking countries is usually referring to a heated sandwich made from bread that is a roll (long rather than square, with an outer crust and sliced lengthways in half), usually some form of Italian bread in keeping with the Italian namesake. Panini’s as far as I’m aware are filled with anything you want, but specifically are heated, usually (or exclusively?) in a press of some kind. Jaffles are like toasties, I’d personally call them a subset of toastie, heated in a specific type of press called a jaffle machine and made only with sliced, square, toast style bread as you’d likely get in a cheap, pre-sliced and packaged loaf. The type of press is important to qualify as a jaffle, as is the bread type and shape because these machines will only fit certain standardised bread types and needs to seal shut during heating. When you put a filled sandwich (with just about any filling combo but almost always with cheese), built with two, square, toasting slices, in to a jaffle machine the shape of the cavity in this machine forces a diagonal division between two opposing corners of the bread which also squashes the filling in to either of the two bread triangles formed on either side of this diagonal. The section of dividing line between the triangles compresses the two slices of bread together in that section, which gets particularly hot and forms a snappable, dark coloured ridge between the two halves of the jaffle. When your jaffle is done, it comes out as a single object with the two halves stuck together by the dividing line, but to eat, you typically apply pressure to each opposing half causing the brittle, dividing line to snap giving you two triangular halves of a sandwich with filling completely sealed inside.
You could perhaps say ‘who calls a panini a toastie for $500?’, because toasties have a much broader, looser definition like paninis. Even though the classic ‘toastie’ will more likely be similar to a jaffle, (though crucially not heated in a jaffle machine and thus not having the jaffle shape imposed upon it), it could actually be any bread and just about any filling (though almost always including cheese), much like a panini.
I really don’t like jaffles and I have noticed a decline in their popularity as I’ve gotten older. They are a good idea in theory, but in practice, because the machine crimps the perimeter of the bread slices together and also the dividing line between the halves as well, you end up with burning hot filling and steam sealed and squashed inside of two bulged areas, one for each triangle. Those crimped edges and dividing line mean eating one involves a chore of biting through a lot of plain, unfilled, nearly burned toast before getting to all the filling which having been trapped inside is ridiculously hot and inevitably burns you. It also means that, the contents tends to get kind of steamed during cooking, making things quite flabby. Much prefer a toastie made in a sandwich press, which is basically a panini press minus the grill lines.
You’ve just described a toastie and toastie maker. I don’t know what this jaffle nonsense is all about, but it sounds like someone is sneaking toasties through customs in a dodgy trenchcoat!
Jaffles and their associated machine are represented here
Toasties here and here, and here, and here where it doesn’t even have a lid, and this one which should really just be called a Reuben but the Aussies stick “toastie” on as a suffix.
Note the variety of breads and fillings. Toasties are a very flexible concept.Those toasties have been cooked any number of ways, under a grill (broiler to the yanks), in a pan, hell even a toaster followed by a microwave, also very commonly in one of these, a sandwich press, which as you can see is flat and and does not seal. Those also sometimes come with little ridges for grill lines like the American panini presses, but I prefer this style as it’s more versatile.
If you google image search toasties you’ll probably see a few jaffles in the results but if you search jaffles you’re going to pretty much only see… jaffles, which have that characteristic shape imposed by that particular machine.
In conclusion all jaffles are toasties, but not all toasties are jaffles. If it’s been made in a machine that imposes that particular jaffle shape on to it by way of sealing the sandwich in like a waffle iron, then it’s a jaffle.
Nope, that’s a toastie maker, plain and simple.
I’ll accept that your first three images could get away with being called toasties, but making a sandwich with a slice of toast doesn’t count. Open topped sandwiches of any kind should be taken out and shot, however they’re prepared. I’ll give cheese on toast a pass, but only because it’s a separate category.
Just because people mistakenly call toasties ‘Jaffles’, doesn’t mean that’s what they are. It’s wrong. Wrong I tell you! Jaffle’s not even a real word!
I really want a toastie now :(
Brit
NO THEY WON’T!! STOP LYING!!
[jk]
Huh. As an American, I thought my mom was the only person who referred to them as cheese toasties.
Thanks for that classic.
To this day my friends know not to call a melt a grilled cheese around me or they’re going to hear my shitty retelling of this.
I love this copy pasta
What the fuck is a subreddit?
It’s a place where subs can gossip about their doms
if italians invented the grilled cheese
Oh, Great Sage please teach us your ways
Whilst this was a very entertaining read, you dropped your pedanticness (pedantry?) when you started calling Lemmy communities ‘subreddits’.
If we can’t call a tomato and cheese toasty a grilled cheese with tomato we definitely can’t call these communities subreddits! :D
I regret to inform you that it is in fact a Reddit copypasta, and not original content.
I feel betrayed
It’s a copy paste from reddit and I didn’t feel like editing the glory
Grilled cheese with bacon is grilled cheese
Bacon melt
People are actually in this thread discussing how feasible this is as if it were a real plan down to calculating specific costs and supporting them with URLs.
Never change, Lemmy.
Many of us do have this fantasy.
I’m sick of seeing $6 for a bag of fries and $12 for a basic ass sandwich.
I mean, it’s a bummer when the bougie burger places do this, but when the taco trucks and teriyaki shops near me started costing more than $2 a taco or $10 for a plate of yakisoba, I knew shit was getting hard out there.
Here in Canada we’ve got trucks selling 3 tacos for like $18. People here are out of their minds
My god. I mean, it’s probably a fair price to pay for no mass shootings and universal health care, but still wild.
$10 yakisoba???
I live in a small town in Oregon. A few years ago, it was $7. Now it’s $10.
Makes me wonder what people are paying for bread, Kraft cheese (or a knockoff of the same) and butter/margarine.
Seriously, a single grilled cheese shouldn’t be more than $1, it should be much less… At least in materials… The cost of grilling it and cleaning up and whatnot should still be really cheap. Even if you wrap the sandwiches in wax/parchment paper or whatever and serve it, you should still be able to make a profit per sandwich. Whether you would be better off doing this rather than getting a job at McDonald’s or whatever… That will depend on how popular the food truck is…
There used to be a vending machine in a hosiptal near me that would heat up a premade grilled cheese sandwich for £2. Being a vending machine in a hospital, they had to be making at least enough to cover the costs plus wastage. I’d say that somewhere with high footfall, especially on a cold day, you could make at least some profit from this.
A few years back in HollandN(UTRECHT) one shop actually ONLY sold sandwiches (not grilled) for a buck or so. They had LINES. Then shit got renod
None of this sentence makes any sense at all man
Just saying the concept works, ppl DO want a simply Sammy for a buck and the ingredients are less as 30% of sales price even with some real decent toppings. But renovation (and extreme rent) only allows multi nationals to compete at busy places like city central stations etc.
Gaslamp district in San Diego had a cafeteria like this years ago, guessing it’s no longer a thing, but simple cheap menu would have steady customers, maybe profitable, it’s the business development people who would oppose.
There was one in metro vancouver area, it was a store front. but it was just cheap grilled cheese nothing else. like costco hot dog pricing
It still there? I’m in downtown but go through metro enough it’d be worth knowing about
I no longer see it so maybe COVID lock down killed business
Id love to see food trucks that were dirt cheap and just did 1 food. Please park this grilled cheese truck outside my house
I went to a food truck festival a few weeks ago, and holy shit the prices of stuff. I don’t think there was a single item you could get for less than $18, and that was like the price of three french fries.
Yes but they were artisanal french fries
Yeah that’s how it is here. Food trucks are only at events and event food costs a fortune for some reason. You’d think that having 1000s of hungry people in one place would allow the to drop the price a bit but nah gotta squeeze us for everything.
You’d think that having 1000s of hungry people in one place would allow the to drop the price a bit
That’s the sound of market demand going up, baby!
TBF food trucks are insanely expensive (like, $80K+ expensive) so I don’t really blame owners for charging whatever people will pay. I’m just amazed people pay that much.
Yeah classic food truck venue here is an event at a brewery where they’re legally required to serve food. So you buy tickets and then provide to the vendors, but if you work out the prices it ends up being insane with super small quantities. They always have to make the food weird too, sometimes it’s cool but sometimes you just want normal shitfood.
I wanna do one where it’s like simple lowbrow stoner food done just a little fancy. Like grilled PB&J, but the peanut butter is the good stuff and the jam has the full berries in it, sourdough bread that can really take a heavy fry in some salted butter. The kind of stuff that’s dirt simple to make but really shines with a bit of extra love.
for some reason.
Because useful idiots are proud to pay for it then complain they don’t have enough money.
In Colorado, that has been my experience for over a decade. Food truck food was never cheap here. In Portland, just this year, I managed a few great and cheap meals from their food carts.
Trucks that do 1 or 2 foods are not that uncommon. We have a fish and chip truck and a glazed donut truck. But none are cheap.
But none are cheap.
This is the real kicker. Businesses charge what people are willing to pay, not what stuff costs to produce.
In my city: there was two stoners who ran around making three types of ramen - vegan, non-vegan (their broth is a different), and regular (they crack an egg).
It was like $6-7.
I loved those guys and used to follow them around.
Imagine paying $6 for noodles.
They probably loved you, lol.
A ramen groupie
I’m excited to introduce my latest business:
The $.99 Grilled Cheese Food Truck. Conveniently located next to the $1 Grilled Cheese Food Truck. Come with $1, leave with a grilled cheese and money still in your pocket (yes, we give change).
Honestly, from my experience with whole prices and no sales tax in Europe, I might just stay with the first truck.
I would go with the first truck specifically NOT to get a penny back.
Come to Canada, we got rid of pennies and legalized weed.
Welcome to the future!
If you sorted out the methodology one person could staff a changeless truck, you start giving change thats a lot of time.
Put this outside a good number of pubs in the UK and you’ll make an absolute killing. It would have to offer a £1 toastie, of course, but the principle is the same.
ACAB, my good chap.
Yeah, hi. I’m lactose and gluten intolerant and I was wondering if…
Yes you can fuck off with or without grilled cheese.
Yes you can fuck off with or without your face grilled
Fix’d
If you ever find yourself around Cleveland, OH, find a Melt: https://meltbarandgrilled.com/menu/
Melt is crazy good. Half sandwiches, vegan, gluten free, or full on grease and meat and dairy. I go once every time I visit Ohio. I’d go twice if I hated my body.
Why would anyone ruin a grilled cheese sandwich with a slice of tomato?
Sure, tomatoes bad, but have you tried jalapenos?
That does sound good
You two are the exact type of people to get kicked out of line at the grilled cheese truck.
NO GRILLED CHEESE FOR YOU! NEXT!
Lol that’s exactly what I thought of when I made my comment
Sure, but that’s a melt, not a grilled cheese
Why the fuck would I order a jalapeno melt at a grilled cheese truck?
Pickles on grilled cheese is the superior grilled cheese and everyone that says otherwise can go right to hell
I say otherwise, & I will happily bathe in the righteous flames of the eternally damned, rather than suffer the unholy blight of pickles on my beloved grilled cheese.
Probably got the bread soggy with their damned pickle juice too!
Juh-lah-pino juice, green olive juice
Beautifully written. This brought tears to my eyes and now my grilled cheese is soggy.
Anything other than bread and cheese is a melt.
Let’s keep it calm here, ok?
What about butter or mayo?
It’s not just important, it’s necessary.
Mom made them with a thin smear ofmiracle whip inside the sammy when I was little. So good. Never tried mayo. Gotta give it a whirl.
You can use it to crisp the outside instead of butter.
I’d heard of mayo on it,but thought it was just for flavor. I gotta try that soon.
Pickle melt
suppresses violence.
Because tomatoes are the perfect fruit/vegetable and improve every single dish they’re in, without exception.
Don’t make me tap the sign again.
Except for grilled cheese
Lies! #tomatohate
Anything else added to a grilled cheese sandwich automatically makes it not a grilled cheese sandwich.
I wanna open a beer garden the size of a parking spot next to it that sells cans of Rainier for a dollar out of a cooler and has a boom box and some plastic kiddie furniture. Party on.
Mount Near Beer!
Tacoma Corona
To be fair, I’d pay $5 for 5 grilled cheese sandwiches and eat them all in one setting.
There would be a line around the block. This is the grilled cheese of everyone’s childhood. Add a sprinkle of salt or use salted butter when cooking on the skillet and I would be in line with everyone else holding a fiver.
Salt? That’s it, your head’s going on the griddle.
Man, I’m so embarrassed for them.
Really? A very light sprinkle of salt when the sandwich is on the buttered griddle is the shit, especially if you’re using a cheese that is lower in salt. Get that nice crust on the bread with a savory pop. Combine that with a tomato soup and it’s the bomb.
Don’t knock it until you try it.
Edit: bloody purists. Gonna turn this into a melt/grilled cheese thing aren’t you.
You’re really asking for it, huh.
Tomato soup? Gonna have to flip your head over on the griddle. This is embarrassing for you.
(in case you never got it, read the right side of the food truck.)
But I didn’t say anything about a tomato!
(Yeah, I missed it)
Use a thin layer of mayonnaise instead of butter before putting it on the pan for a commercial-worthy grilled cheese.
I wonder if it have a vegan option.
Here’s your plain toast
Ah yes, the classic dish: Grilled Null Sandwich.
Well, it’s grilled cheese. You can remove the cheese yourself, see what I care.
Sure, I’d give you dry toast for $1.
I’d probably double that menu to include coffee.
No cream.
No sugar.
Take your coffee and grilled cheese sandwich and fuck off over thereabouts
What kind of combo is grilled cheese and coffee? Lemonade and grilled cheese, maybe.
Coffee is life.
There is nothing coffee doesn’t go with
