@writingprompts From a folder of mine labeled “Inspiration”:
He has to kill himself every time one of his teammates is killed. Until one day someone dies and you wake up the next day and they’re still dead, and the time loop guy just shrugs when you see him later that day. He never really liked that guy anyway. After that everyone gets a little more nervous and a lot nicer to him.
Re:Zero is about that power.
“Dammit, Eternus, I hate when you do this mysterious shit, just fucking tell us.”
“It doesn’t work.”
“Telling us doesn’t work?”
“It never does, Streak. It never has and never will. I keep telling you this, and you keep pretending like we’ve never had this discussion.”
We’ve had it more than he knows, because for every one he remembers, I’ve had to deal with him doing it a dozen times. Asshole.
“Well, what do you expect, Eternus? All we get is you interrupting and slamming into us and being dickish in general. You say you’re reliving the mistakes, but all we know is the present, the now. But you expect us to just suck it up and do what you say. It gets old, fast.”
"No shit, Streak, you wanna guess how fast dying because your surly ass wants to play pissing contest instead of listening to the guy that’s saved every life on the planet a dozen times, and your life so many hundreds of times I can’t even keep track. Why do people do this? The psychics, the time travelers, it doesn’t matter how many times we’re right, it’s this same, shitty argument.
Yes, I expect you to fucking listen to me because this is the fifth time we’ve had this argument for me, and that means I’ve died five times today. Which isn’t even a record, for fucks sake. And, it’s you whining that’s the worst part of it. I almost wish I could just die and not come back, if it meant not dealing with you again."
The General did his usual, “Gentleman, can it. Eternus, just brief us; Streak, go take a walk and cool off.”
Fifth time. Fifth fucking time. "The Ragnarok are going to hit London. We get there, and they’re tearing the city apart. This will be my fifth run, and we’ve only made it maybe two minutes in the fight before Nuke unleashes and we’re all ashes. Streak, every single time, tries to play stupid and just hits him at speed. It keeps not working. It just gives Nuke more kinetic energy to redirect into his blast.
If we’re going to even get close, we gotta either hit him hard enough to put him down permanently, or try something new. Streak isn’t following the plan. We need to leave him behind this time, try to at least gather more details before I get taken down. I said this last time, and you said… "
“I said he’s fast enough to cross the ocean and get there before we do.”
“Finally! Something different. That’s the first time you’ve interrupted me with that! The last two times you waited until I was done and said that of course you said it, it was true.”
“Believe it or not, Eternus, I do pay attention. I started thinking it and realized I must have thought it before.”
“So, what’s the new play, general?”
“I talk to him anyway. If we haven’t tried before?” I shook my head, almost giddy at a new twist. “Good, then you four get ready, I’ll pin down Streak and get him to hang back.”
So, we did. Me, Hellion, Damage, and Lightstorm got geared up and moved to the transport room, where Switch was ready to port the team once the General showed. And, we got there before the alert too. Two new occurrences. Maybe this would be the right one.
The alarm blared, and the General ran in, pulling on his helmet, “Alright team, let’s handle business.” There was a tugging at my stomach as Switch switched us, and the fight was on.
“Dammit, Eternus, I hate when you do this mysterious shit, just fucking tell us.”
“It doesn’t work.”
“Telling us doesn’t work?”
“It never does, Streak. It never has and never will. I keep telling you this, and you keep pretending like we’ve never had this discussion.”
We’ve had it more than he knows, because for every one he remembers, I’ve had to deal with him doing it a dozen times. Asshole.
“Well, what do you expect, Eternus? All we get is you interrupting and slamming into us and being dickish in general. You say you’re reliving the mistakes, but all we know is the present, the now. But you expect us to just suck it up and do what you say. It gets old, fast.”
"No shit, Streak, you wanna guess how fast dying because your surly ass wants to play pissing contest instead of listening to the guy that’s saved every life on the planet a dozen times, and your life so many hundreds of times I can’t even keep track. Why do people do this? The psychics, the time travelers, it doesn’t matter how many times we’re right, it’s this same, shitty argument.
Yes, I expect you to fucking listen to me because this is the sixth time we’ve had this argument for me, and that means I’ve died six times today. Which isn’t even a record, for fucks sake. And, it’s you whining that’s the worst part of it. I almost wish I could just die and not come back, if it meant not dealing with you again."
The General did his usual, “Gentleman, can it. Eternus, just brief us; Streak, go take a walk and cool off.”
Sixth time. Sixth fucking time. "The Ragnarok are going to hit London. We get there, and they’re tearing the city apart. This will be my sixth run, and we’ve only made it maybe two minutes in the fight before Nuke unleashes and we’re all ashes. Streak, every single time, tries to play stupid and just hits him at speed. It keeps not working. It just gives Nuke more kinetic energy to redirect into his blast.
If we’re going to even get close, we gotta either hit him hard enough to put him down permanently, or try something new. Streak isn’t following the plan. We need to leave him behind this time, try to at least gather more details before I get taken down. I said this last time, and you said… "
“I said he’s fast enough to cross the ocean and get there before we do.”
“Yeah, and then you went and talked to him to get him to stay away, and the fucker just ran around the planet and hit Nuke from behind and we all died faster this time.”
“Maybe if I make it an order.”
“Fine, fucking try it, but if it doesn’t work this time, I’m shooting him in the damn knee next time.”
“Eternus, no, you won’t.”
“The fuck I won’t, General. And you’ll back my play, or I swear by all that’s holy, I’ll stay behind, and just recruit a team that will listen. You all only have to die once.”
“You’re serious.”
“As it fucking gets. Man, I have died over ten thousand times. A few hundred of those were me killing myself so I could come back and save one of you. Putting a bullet in Streak? That would be a side benefit to this whole dance. So, are you going to give me a code for it, or do I flip the table and be done with it?”
“Penguin. The current code is penguin.”
“Awesome, you go corral the asshole because the alarm…”
And the alarm went off. We jumped into action, and…
“Ahhhh, you fuck, you fucking bastard, you fucking shot me!”
“You’re gods damn right I did. Your dumb ass refused to listen. This is trip seven for me, asshole. And every time, it’s your punk ass that gets us killed.”
The General ran into the room, spooling up his power as he came. I raised my hands, “Penguin.”
The General stopped cold, “I gave you the code?”
"Yup. This is trip seven. Last time, you ordered Streak here to stay behind. It almost worked, but he flew off the handle when he saw Damage lose his head, literally, and pulled the exact same shit instead of letting things play out and let me get better intel on the fight.
This time, I figure we’ve got a few hours before he heals enough to be a problem. More if I shoot him in the other knee too."
“Let’s not go that far.”
“Not that far, you gave him the code so he could shoot me? You’re both assholes, fuck both of you!”
So I shot him in the head.
“Sorry, General, this has been a bad day. Let’s just get to the fight and I’ll off myself if we get it handled, come back and figure out a way to do this without doing that.”
“It wouldn’t bother me so much if you didn’t seem happy about it.”
“Hey, you haven’t been dealing with this prick for eight hours on repeat, you might be a bit happy if you had.”
The alarm started blaring, and we ran for the transport room…
“Ahhhh, you fuck, you fucking bastard, you fucking shot me!”
“You’re gods damn right I did. Your dumb ass refused to listen. This is trip ten for me, asshole. And every time I didn’t, it’s your punk ass that gets us killed.”
The General ran into the room, spooling up his power as he came. I raised my hands, “Penguin.”
The General stopped cold, “I gave you the code?”
"Yup. This is trip ten. Sixth time, you ordered Streak here to stay behind. It almost worked, but he flew off the handle when he saw Damage lose his head, literally, and pulled the exact same shit instead of letting things play out and let me get better intel on the fight.
Shooting him has gotten us almost there, and I think we can make this the last trip."
I considered just shooting him in the head again, but if we did win the fight, the General would just make me come back.
“Streak, the last few times, I shot you in the fucking face so I wouldn’t have to deal with you. That’s what it took to keep us from dying. Are you going to play nice and not say something stupid that gets you shot in the face again, and let us handle the fight without you?”
“You shot me in the face?”
“Damn skippy. Three times so far. Wanna make it four?”
“You are such a prick.”
“Yeah, yeah, you keep saying that, and I keep keeping you from dying permanently, so who’s the bigger prick here? Just shut up, heal, and stay ready in case we need you for the finish, yeah?”
“Fuck you.”
And the alarm hit…
“How’s the knee?”
“It fucking hurts.”
“Well, now that we figured out what to do, if you ask reeaaaly sweet, and give me something that will convince you to keep your ass at base until you’re called, I can shoot myself and use it.”
“Your codes are fucking stupid.”
“Yeah, well, you’re the only one that thinks that, and you’re the only one that got injured today. So, you’re stupid. Fine, whatever. But maybe think up a code in case you decide to wear your ass on your shoulders again.”
“You smug fuck, we did fine before you came along. We’d do fine without you, too, even if we died.”
“You know, you said that once before. Then, five hours later you were begging me to shoot myself so that Lady Rain wouldn’t have to live with her face burnt all to hell. And I fucking did it, James, I ate a fucking bullet so that your now ex could walk around with a normal face.”
“How do I know that’s true? You could make up anything you wanted.”
“Why? Why fuck with you with lies? The truth is so much harder for you to take. James. Jamie, if I was that kind of person, why am I even here? I could be rich beyond anyone’s dreams with this ‘power’. I’m just a guy when it’s fight time. No speed, no super strength, no mind manipulation, just the ability to die and come back. But I’m here, with you, beside you, and this paranoid bullshit is what I get? Come the fuck on, man.”
"Dude, I…
I don’t fucking know man, I’m sorry. But your shit is crazy. You just show up, all ‘come with me if you want to live’ mysterious and shit, and then we win. All we can see is now. And it’s crazy. We trust you, I trust you, but it’s frustrating, and it makes me crazy too. You’re magic, you’re living luck as far as I can see, but you say it’s you flipping back in time, and that’s harder to deal with.
You get that, right? That if you said you were seeing the future, or reading probabilities or something, it wouldn’t fuck with me the same."
“Why would it matter?”
"Dude, if you’re saying to do something because the other way didn’t work, it means we fucked up. Something one of us did got somebody killed. Not something we might do, if you were just psychic. Something we did, something where we got ourselves, or one of our friends, or a civilian, killed. Or, apparently, maimed and scarred.
That’s heavy. Yeah, you die for it, you see all the deaths, but you get to fucking fix it. Us? We’re fuck-ups that you have to fix."
“That’s bullshit Jamie. You guys did do fine before I came along. But nobody can fight what we fight forever, perfectly. You aren’t fuck-ups, you’re fucking heroes, putting your bodies, your lives on the line. All I do is give you cushion. That should be my fucking call name ‘the human insurance policy’.”
“I mean, you did shoot Quake in the balls today. That was pretty damn heroic if you ask me.”
“He’s gonna kill me if he gets out of jail.”
“Nah, he’ll try, and then you’ll come back and fuck him up even worse.”
“Jesus, Jamie, if any of those fucks ever figure out how it works, we are beyond fucked.”
“Maybe. Maybe not. You don’t even know how it really works, just that you restart the day from when you woke up. Maybe there’s other ways your power can protect you. For all you know, if it’s bad enough, you might wake up years in the past, because that’s what it would take to survive it.”
“Jamie, don’t. Don’t even say that.”
ALERT ALERT, PLANETARY THREAT INCOMING
“Streak, this is Eternus, our new member. He’s a time manipulator of sorts.”
“Good to know, General. How’s it hanging, Eternus?”
Not fucking good, Jamie, not fucking good.
“Oh, I guess it’s hanging fine enough. We’ll have to see what the future holds.”
Again.
this is good shit right here. I’d read a sequel
My kid has been telling me the same thing.
I kinda want to, because it’s still in my head, but I don’t know if it needs continuing. It might make it fall apart because it works with that as an ending.
I have to say, this is the best writing prompt reply I’ve seen since I got on lemmy.
Well damn! Thank you!
Bravo, that was excellent! That felt like Worm
That’s pretty damn high praise
It really did! I would absolutely read a whole book of that! (Or dozens of them, if the length of Worm is any indication)
Man that was such a good read.
Well done
Thanks :)
Ngl, I’m proud of this one. Even made my family listen to me read it lol
That was a great read. Is it from something?
My head.
I got lucky and the prompt inspired me fully. That’s pretty rare, normally I just get an idea and then have to really work at it to get something readable. This was pure stream of consciousness.
I’m legit proud of it.
This would make an absolutely amazing TTRPG adventure as well. Characters keep their memories and experience, no one else in the town remembers a thing. Always say the same lines, etc.
DM forgets to keep a consistent detail
“Butterfly Effect”
@writingprompts @FelixMortane Oh my god, yes!
Reminded me of the ending to the Loki show
It’s a couple decades old I think but you should check out Tru Calling. Cries for help from dead people in the morgue pop Tru back to the beginning of the day so she can try to prevent their deaths.
Edge of Tomorrow does this
If you want a bit of a “Deadpool” type edge, that hero can purposely kill themselves if they fail the mission to get another go.
Or turn it another way, and we eventually discover they’ve started routinely doing so until they get everything absolutely perfect. They’ve lived multiple subjective “years” in the past few weeks, and it’s begun affecting them much more than they realize…
Actual game mechanic from In Stars And Time. Highly recommend it.
There’s a series called The Perfect Run that’s basically this. Pretty well written for the genre (I’ve only read the first book). Cyberpunk, fantasy, LitRPG type story off royal road.
https://www.goodreads.com/series/329243-the-perfect-run https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/36735/the-perfect-run
Finished all 3. Pretty good but definitely has webnovel vibes.
There is an anime that kind-of does this… if you can watch anime, Mahou Shoujo Madoka Magica is an absolute masterpiece, but you have to push through the first three episodes (or first hour of the first movie) before it starts going. It’s 4 hours long in total, so it can be watched in one setting.
Went in expecting a show about cute magical girls (a friend begged me to watch it).
What I got: existential dread, despair, corruption, psychological horror, tragedy, beheading, mercy killing, mental deterioration.
Also: to this day the best piece of media I’ve seen.
Art, music, story, characters… they are just so good. I’ve seen it more than 10 times, and I still enjoy watching it again.
For me, it’s a must watch for any anime fan. Also anyone who wants to live with me.
Credens justitiam is a straight up banger
I’m not familiar and don’t watch anime, but are you saying you have to push through 25% of the total content before it gets good?
It’s all good, but not what you would expect.
Also it all gets explained later on.
No, 25% for the horror to hit you. The first three episodes seem just like a regular magical girl series, even though something seems slightly… off.
Then it gets worse.
The anime re:zero does this. It’s VERY good. One of the best written pieces of fiction of this type I’ve ever seen.
@Kathrin @writingprompts @writingcommunity @writing I am unaware of that specific powerset but Moira McTaggart comes close with her (recent) Groundhog Life powers.
src 🔗
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Moira_MacTaggert#House_of_XI mean this is basically Re:Zero
Wow, talk about blaming your team for your failings.
