My wife is educated, and can hold her own in a conversation. She’s witty and capable. I open her car door (not every time) because I like doing something nice for her. She appreciates the gesture, but doesn’t expect it. I think we should let the people in the relationship decide what works for them.
My old boss said he knew a married couple who sat down every year on their anniversary and discussed whether they wanted to remain married. I got the impression they had been together for quite some time and really cared for each other. That is not for me, but if that works for them, great!
Hey, you do you. I have no problem with it if it comes naturally. But any sort of expectation here just gives me the cringe-shivers. If the woman expects someone to open the door for her, yikes! If the man expects that he’s the one to open the car door for the woman, yikes! And the basis of this thread seemed to be more around a woman expecting to have the car door opened for her which is why I wrote what I wrote.
yeah I think that’s important to emphasize. I think doing it to be corny/cheesy/romantic or whatever within your relationship is one thing. The expectation is another thing.
I honestly had no idea what dating was growing up. All I saw was men opening doors and putting jackets over puddles. I was always like: “why wouldn’t you just walk around the puddle instead of ruining a jacket?” Also, when you grow up and find that a lot of those guys that do that chivalrous stuff are like wife-beaters and you’re like … wtf.
Yeah, I 100% agree about the chivalry and dating. And as soon as you say the woman is as strong as me (from a competence, intellect, and emotional standpoint) and is an equal partner in a relationship, a lot of the chivalry stuff doesn’t make sense.
My wife is educated, and can hold her own in a conversation. She’s witty and capable. I open her car door (not every time) because I like doing something nice for her. She appreciates the gesture, but doesn’t expect it. I think we should let the people in the relationship decide what works for them.
My old boss said he knew a married couple who sat down every year on their anniversary and discussed whether they wanted to remain married. I got the impression they had been together for quite some time and really cared for each other. That is not for me, but if that works for them, great!
Hey, you do you. I have no problem with it if it comes naturally. But any sort of expectation here just gives me the cringe-shivers. If the woman expects someone to open the door for her, yikes! If the man expects that he’s the one to open the car door for the woman, yikes! And the basis of this thread seemed to be more around a woman expecting to have the car door opened for her which is why I wrote what I wrote.
yeah I think that’s important to emphasize. I think doing it to be corny/cheesy/romantic or whatever within your relationship is one thing. The expectation is another thing.
I honestly had no idea what dating was growing up. All I saw was men opening doors and putting jackets over puddles. I was always like: “why wouldn’t you just walk around the puddle instead of ruining a jacket?” Also, when you grow up and find that a lot of those guys that do that chivalrous stuff are like wife-beaters and you’re like … wtf.
Yeah, I 100% agree about the chivalry and dating. And as soon as you say the woman is as strong as me (from a competence, intellect, and emotional standpoint) and is an equal partner in a relationship, a lot of the chivalry stuff doesn’t make sense.