*trying to buy salad ingredients for the family cookout*
The cashier: sorry state prevents us from selling more than 5 cucumbers at a time.
Texas is ran by dildos so this is really just thinly veiled self preservation at this point
The lawmakers are afraid of the competition
Don’t want to start WWIII but even I and my fifty buttplugs were surprised to hear that WALMART was selling sex toys.
Snorted and almost choked on my coffee when I scrolled past this.
The worst part about this is that I’d rather Republicans waste time with pointless legislation such as this rather than something damaging that they could actually enforce.
So its now illegal to have more than 6 bananas in your home in Texas?
Sigh, this is gonna be an awkward call to mom…
What if it was a dildo-gun?
What part of 'shall not be infringed ’ do you not understand!? 🤣
Is there a shortage of dildos in Texas that they need such laws to stop hoarding?
There is decidedly not a shortage of dildos in Texas.
Have you seen their politicians?
those are just plain ol’ dicks
At first I was like “barbaric”, but then I thought to myself that 6 dildos per person sounds abundant. I’ve decided to believe that they were about to fight an owner of 7 dildos and implemented that ban to reduce their power. Like “there are 7 of us and you have only 6 dildos what are you going to do” because the 7th dildo would be illegal.
And yes I know that the grounds of this ban are absurd and barbaric, I do wish hunger and pestilence upon those who voted it in, it’s just that any discussion regarding it had to be hilarious. What are they trying to prevent by restricting the access to 7th dildo, gang wars?
I’m guessing they are not limiting the number of guns you can own though.
Ever bring a dildo to a gun fight?
yea that’d be a rookie mistake
This dude knows where the purple dildo is in GTA Vice City.
Exactly!
Roflmfao!!!
Guilty as charged!
Imagining muffled cackles from a chamber of dildos
I’m gonna buy a new one tomorrow for shits and giggles. 🤪
Neo-puritanism needs to die. I’m getting excited because I think humanity is just generally getting fed up with control. We’re done with this shit.
At least none of these people should be violent. They can have their views. But law is always violent. So it has no business being an extension of anyone’s sexual views. If you violently impose your sexual perspective on others you are as good as a rapist in my book.
Ted Cruz ran out and is trying to hoard them all for himself.
Ran out? Does he know they are supposed to come out as well as go in?
As a non-carbon based extraterrestrial lizard alien, he consumes the soft supple rubber that many dildos are made of as a form of sustenance.
I would never have thought to go to walmart to buy a sex toy if I hadn’t seen them somewhat prominently displayed on my way towards the vitamin aisle.
Don’t most people just buy them online anyway? How the fuck would they even enforce this? The whole thing is a joke.
They’re criminalizing things more likely to be owned by people they’re trying to cleanse. Maybe cops show up and find you’ve exceeded your government allotted sex toy limit… would you lose your job? Your kids? Do you even call the cops? Do you hide the dildos in a gun safe and leave the guns out, to make the cops happy?
I find it hilarious that cops are going to start driving around with dildos in their car. You know, in case they need to plant one.
Rookie, sprinkle a little KY on him. Perfect.
