This post is lengthy but it carries a question I have been thinking about for a long time, thank you for opening it :]

Introduction

I will present a writedown of my thoughts on the topic, you may read it if you want to discuss my perspective. I’d be equally delighted to just read some thoughts or opinions from you.

My perspective

I’m at least questioning my current identity, however I’m often troubled by the problem stated in the title.

Gender Roles/Stereotypes

I consider gender roles outdated and problematic at least. This is possibly stemming from the fact, that I’m unhappy with the one assigned to me. In case I was too ambigous: I’m thinking about constructs including but not limited to:

  • Men should be strong, they may pursue technical interests.
  • Women are caring and supportive, their primary interests should be of a social nature. They care about looks and feels

I think these prejudices are actively harmful to non-conforming people, since they may be perceived as socially inept or weird (consider young adults/school).

Transgender Identity

On to the Trans Identity Part. I have gained the impression that transitioned people are doing their best to fulfill the roles and stereotypes assigned to their desired gender.

Conclusion

To me, it seems like efforts towards gender equality, and therefore the abolishment of stereotypes are clashing with trans peoples desire to fit in with society.

I see both sides, they have motivation I can understand, it feels like a conflict that cannot be resolved.

Thank you for sitting and reading through this, I’d be happy to discuss anything related.

  • JayjaderEnglish
    2·
    6 hours ago

    I think Ada already said it better than I will, but yeah there’s a few too many simplifications and short-circuits (in reasoning/logic) in what you have written. If society stopped claiming people “should” be this or that just because of some physical characteristics they were born with, the “conflict” you outline ceases to exist. Trans people (and “non-conforming” people in general) could fulfill whatever roles and stereotypes they resonate with, and still fit in just fine.

    Plus, the stereotypes some of us resonate with simply do not neatly map onto society’s stereotypes of men and women. Some people who have outwardly transitioned may seem to be moulding themselves into society’s “traditional” gender norms, sure. Putting aside those who do so out of self preservation or fear of persecution, I would argue it’s just happenstance (in other words, pure luck) that who they want to be in life lines up so neatly with these existing delineations. It doesn’t conflict with the push to stop expecting and demanding people fit other people’s schemas.

    I don’t know that stereotypes are necessarily harmful, not do I think that the point of equality is to get rid of them. Rather, they should have no bearing on our worth, and we should not be reducing people to the various stereotypes we know of. We are infinitely more complex and varied beings than any stereotypes that anyone has ever conceived.

    Myself, I prefer to think of stereotypes as archetypes, like in storytelling. They are shortcuts that evoke certain character traits. They cannot describe the totality of a person, only facets. Thus, we should be careful to not expect people to fit “inside” them; therein lies the/a root of a lot of harm. If that is too difficult, better to do away with thinking in terms of stereotypes than demean those who don’t fit them.