“Your delivery will arrive on a day between a point in time and a different point in time. You better be there when the driver pretends to check if someone’s at home and leaves without ringing anyway - not like you have anything better to do you lazy fuck.”
Next thing, I take the day off to wait for the package (or work from home) and I get a message in the afternoon saying “you weren’t home, your package is delivered at such and such drop off point”… always
“Your delivery will arrive on a day between a point in time and a different point in time. You better be there when the driver pretends to check if someone’s at home and leaves without ringing anyway - not like you have anything better to do you lazy fuck.”
Next thing, I take the day off to wait for the package (or work from home) and I get a message in the afternoon saying “you weren’t home, your package is delivered at such and such drop off point”… always
The best one is when it just straight up lies and says it was delivered