• Lojcs@lemm.ee
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      1 year ago

      I also would like to learn this. Since you people federated I’ve seen more posts complaining about how aggressive users of this instance are than I did from users of the instance. Yall do seem to think about politics (edit: and hate liberals) a lot more than the average user but I’m yet to see the ‘vitriol’

      Edit: this is a genuine question. What bad experience is everyone talking about when they say hexbear is toxic?

      • EmmaGoldman [she/her, comrade/them]@hexbear.netM
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        1 year ago

        Just as a clarification, our hatred of liberals is not the same as that of right-wingers. We hate capitalist ideology, not “wokeness” or something nonsensical like that. We are the exact people conservatives are trying to shit on when they say that.

      • silent_water [she/her]@hexbear.net
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        1 year ago

        we’re very active and have an anti-lurker culture + no downvotes, so if we see a bad take, we reply instead of downvoting and moving on. this leads a lot of people to get very animated and angry about us.

        • schroed4 [he/Him] @lemm.ee
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          1 year ago

          Most people can’t just move on when they see something that distrubs them, and I think it would be unhealthy for most to change.

          • silent_water [she/her]@hexbear.net
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            1 year ago

            agreed! criticism and folding received criticism (even when it’s offered abrasively) back into your own behavior is essential. this was one of the motivators in disabling downvotes.

            • schroed4 [he/Him] @lemm.ee
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              1 year ago

              I expect it likely works quite well in a community where everyone knows and agrees to that. In my opinion, when the pond gets too big it becomes too hard to tell if what the abrasive-but-fair from the just-being-a-jerk comments

              Like, I was distracted for hours and couldn’t sleep then couldn’t work because of a side-comment insult im a post because it went against someone I strongly believe in. Had to research everything that was being said in the post and carefully reply to move on. That is not the life I want for myself. Don’t know how much of that really apply here, since like someone else said, I haven’t actually seen ‘mean’ hexbear comments outside of hexbear, and never gotten one.

              • silent_water [she/her]@hexbear.net
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                1 year ago

                In my opinion, when the pond gets too big it becomes too hard to tell if what the abrasive-but-fair from the just-being-a-jerk comments

                firm moderation goes a very long way. if someone is just being a jerk, it’s time to remove the comment. if they’re doing it repeatedly, they need to be banned. doesn’t solve everything but we’ve built a very solid community following this approach over the past 3 years. we’re very tight-knit as a result.

                That is not the life I want for myself.

                no worries, it’s not for everyone.