I don’t want to brag, but at 8 years old I could read.

you are now manually breathing

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It was Lewy Body Dementia, I remember because my grandma had it. It’s non-hereditary thankfully, but just as debilitating as Alzheimer’s.

I like ‘bob’s your oyster’ because both original phrases are nonsensical to me. Is there a word isometric to portmanteau but for phrases / idioms?

You can afford to send out more shoots than a seraphim has eyes when you were born from the ground gently swaddled in a metric fuckton of starch you generational wealth inheriting bastard.

You really have a way with words 😂