TL;DR: Gained too much weight after I fell and broke my arm + couldn’t really move for a while. I have a lot of trauma related to sports, like I was forced to play football like any other Hungarian kid, and I was awful at it, which made others be angry at me for it, which made me reluctant to do it. Even if I manage to do it, I often get brutal, crippling muscle pain, which makes me fo it even less.
Since I"m Hungarian, I cannot rely on health care at all, especially mental health, as it was the very first thing that got cut, amd I cannot afford private care.
Try Tai Chi.
Low impact, not competitive, and not only gets you in shape, but teaches you self defense at the same time without you even realizing it.
Will it make me go from chubby to muscled in a few months like in those AI slop ads?
Not without additional calisthenics, but if you do a combo of walking/running, martial arts, and calisthenics then yeah, actually, it can. It requires serious dedication, but it is possible if unlikely.