I’m 30 years old (soon to be 31). I’m a new trans woman (still working through how I might accept it and see myself). I’m unsure how far I should go. I’ve spoken at some length on other communities about what it feels like to be “ugly and masc”. I realize feeling like I can’t “pass” as a fem is partly due to deeply rooted transphobia. I have what most older men have: masculine distribution of fat (bit of a belly), hairy everywhere, fears of balding (so far not yet), deepish voice, etc.
If I had no friends or family, I’d probably just go all in: hormone therapies, voice training, surgeries, etc. But I feel like I need to pass in front of my immediate family since I’m sure I wouldn’t be accepted. I love them, but they wouldn’t get it.
I don’t know how far I should go with transitioning. I am currently considering growing out my hair, shaving, and trying to do exercises that conform my body to a more stereotypical feminine shape. Is there a lot of risk in hormone therapies and voice training? Is it hard to go “boy mode” after the fact? What about being 30+ years old and starting it? Should I just accept I’ll never pass?
HRT is cheap, relatively speaking. Just remember that you also need to get frequent blood tests. There can be very small side effects depending on your specific treatment and medical history, so doctors will want to make sure things are kept in check. I’m on spiro and a marathon runner, so I also need to watch potassium, for instance.
The real expense is laser/electrolysis, and eventually surgery if you decide that’s the right path for you. I personally can’t wait to get all the testosterone poisoning gone, but I know it will take time and planning. And it will be worth it!