Portrait of an Only Child, 1989, Celluloid. Artist Unknown.
Poor Richie Rich, money won’t get him his parents’ love.
This kid was insufferable. I guarantee it.
I’m willing to bet he now manages a team of salespeople at a car lot in BFE, Iowa, and regales customers with stories from his glory days while he sneaks hidden fees into the lease.
Finance guy for sure. Captures your attention while he’s babbling on about the good days, and casually just tells you the common customer defaults are selected before he goes back into his glory days of the 90s.
Did you notice i slipped in that defaults for most customers part? Yeah, i almost didn’t either as I was signing and had i clicked ‘OK’, my payment would have doubled for something I would never need. He stopped talking as much when i said, these defaults are a scam and scrolled to page 5 of the options which was “No extras”.
Look at how casual they’re acting.
That’s a kid who loves the Power Glove.
It’s so bad.
This guy stole my girlfriend in 1989, I would have married that lady.
Pretty sure that guy just stole my current wife with that glove.
He loves the Power Glove. It’s so bad.
That’s a kid who gets whatever the fuck he wants
Ok ok I’ll go watch The Wizard. You talked me into it.
California!
Smell the Glove
The light gun was even worse. I had that piece of shit, it never worked. Actual, non-functional tech scam, how Nintendo didn’t get sued over that is beyond me.
Maybe you just can’t aim.
The ducks got away from me, too, man.
But really I think it’s clever how it worked with just a light sensor and one frame of black and white.
Skill issue tbh
All I see is a rich kid. I bet all of his friends were better at the games than he was too, that’s why he’s not smiling.
If you were rich, yes - or rather your parents. We did had one of those thingies to rip SNES roms though.
Is this Boris Johnson? I can see the contempt in those eyes
Parents had money
Took me a minute to realize that there was not, in fact, a pepperoni sticking out of the back of his Game Boy.
Glad I wasn’t the only one!
No NES Max controller? Lame
I think I just unlocked a new level of back pain… I had that same exact television, and the slightly different Nintendo stand with the cabinet door on the side. A friend had the one in the picture though.
In case you were wondering, that nearly empty shelf can fit the NES, and the red bar will fit in the indentation at the bottom of the system and keep it from sliding out when you pull out a game cartridge.
Look like a borg prototype.